Eight

D,

This morning when I went to wake you up, you were already awake and after I sang happy birthday to you , you gave me the biggest grin and said "I'm eight now". You are so excited to grow up and be a big kid. I want to stall time and let you be a little boy for just a little bit longer. Mostly only for selfish reasons though. You have always had an old soul in a kid body. I just want you to stay that little snuggly mama's boy forever. Maybe you'll just be a big mama's boy instead? You do still love to snuggle.

You are growing to be such a little man lately. You are more confident than ever and more assertive with people who would otherwise take advantage of your sweet personality. Its been good for my heart to see you thriving socially and making new friends all the time. You've always been so much more shy than your little brother but you are coming out of your shell more and more, showing off your fun, caring side to more people.

Second grade is treating you well so far. You are enjoying the little bits of extra freedom your personality grants you especially. You are the kid that teachers trust to run errands for them. Even last year you were the kid that your teacher trusted to take other kids places like the nurse or office to check out. You are trustworthy and its good that your teachers are seeing it. Academically, you are thriving too. Math is not your thing but you make it happen. You get it honest kid, sorry.

Baseball is still your thing. You have grown a lot on the field in the last year too. Its crazy how much skill and determination you show on the field. You want to be the best and want to learn. Your coaches have all said how impressed with your drive and how well you take direction. Its shows in your playing too. You are quite the slugger and have settled into the pitcher/ second base rotation with more experienced kids and are showing them a thing or two. To say I'm proud is and understatement. Of course all that baseball and your second favorite pastime, swimming, means you are built like a rock. Tall and slim but literally all muscle.

Of course you also welcomed your little brother Bae with an open heart this year too. I knew you would. You've always had this ease about you when it comes to babies. They always just adore you and he is no exception. You get a little rough with him some times without meaning too but as he gets bigger, I'm sure he will make an excellent wrestling buddy just like Kai. You were so excited to see him for the first time. I will never forget the way your face lit up when you walked into the hospital room and saw him laying there on the bed with me. It was like excitement and a sense of peace all rolled into one. It was as healing to you as it was Michael and me. Like a puzzle piece just clicked int place in your heart.

I am so proud of you D. You are strong in ways beyond your years, you are kind to every one you meet, and you are so very smart. I can't wait to see what the next few years bring you. They will be a period of immense growth, and while I don't think I am ready for it, I know you will handle it with the same grace you handle everything else with. I will always be right here behind you, in awe, if you need me my love.

Love always,
Mama

Why My Kids Do Chores

Seems like lately I have seen a lot of those charts for what age your child can do certain things. Not academic things, household things. Like cleaning up after themselves, helping with laundry, etc.. I've seen as many different ideals as I have pins. Some expect more, some less. Some think scripture memorization is more important, some focus more on what they can reach.

Thing that really caught my attention is that the common comment with these lists and charts is generally along the lines of "I really wish my kids would do this stuff" or "Wow, my kids would never xyz".

Really?

My boys have always been my helpers. Granted, they like to help but its also because they've always been expected to. Especially over the last few years when I had to return to work and was doing it on my own for awhile.

Kids need responsibilities. More than just doing their homework and putting their plate in the sink. They need to learn to be a productive member of a household. They need to know that the laundry fairy doesnt wash, dry, and fold their dirty clothes while everyone sleeps. That those dishes they put in the sink don't magically disapper. The bed they sleep in? Doesn't make itself either.

They live there too. I am their mother, their caretaker, and love them more than life but I am not their maid.  I simply could not do everything it takes to run a household without their help and still get to spend time with them. I want them to be able to be independent and a productive member of their household without feeling like their partner should take care of them.

The boys do chores depending on what needs to be done and what they can handle. Little things like cleaning up their toys and putting things where they belong but also helping with the yard maintenance, sweeping, and cleaning bathrooms. I spent time making sure things were organized in a way they can be independent and not require help. I pared down the things we use to clean to two spray bottles. One with vingar/water and the other with diluted lysol cleaner. Those two bottles will clean anything in your house and both are kid friendly.

D knows how to use the vaccuum correctly while K usually sweeps the hard surfaces because the vaccuum is too heavy for him.

They want to take their lunch instead of buy it? They know how to put together a pb&j.

Not that they do all of those things all the time but they can do it and they don't give me lip about it if I ask them to. It's all simply become part of how our household runs. No charts or special prizes needed*. We all have to care for it and they understand that.

Of course that doesn't mean it's all work around here. The chores and things they do take at most half an hour a day. The difference is that when you do a little every day and there are more people doing it, it goes faster and leaves a lot more time for fun and snuggles. So its a double bonus. The house stays cleaner and the boys get more of my undivided attention!

It's mostly about trusting your child with responsibility. Start small and understand it might take some guidance at first. Given the chance, any one is going to sit back and let someone else do all the dirty work but given direction any one can learn to help. Even kids.


*Not to say we've never used charts. We have used a ticket system in the past but it fell to the wayside. They just didn't seem to care about the ticket part and did their "jobs" anyway. Just another reason my kids rock my socks.

Two Swimmy Fish

Its official, both my boys can swim! D learned to swim unassisted last Summer but has only gotten stronger and more confident this year. Lately he has been perfecting his dive. Its progressed from a cringe worthy belly flop to a much more sophisticated looking dive.



K on the other hand refused to be in the water and not be wrapped around your face and/ or have a swim vest on until this year. I even tried swim lessons to make it easier and it didn't help.

At the beginning of the swim season this year, I got him a new vest and let him have at it. He has been so much more confident this year its almost like a different kid. He jumps in and puts his face in and swims all around the pool chatting up strangers all day as long as he had his vest. If I took the vest off he would panic. Until recently. His confidence I  the water has grown by leaps and bounds in the last month. Then, today, I decided to try again.



Little fart had me snowed! He took off across the pool like it was no big deal. Jump in and swim to you, mom? No problem. Go fetch that diving ring from water over my head? Check. The only thing I cant convince him to do is backfloat. He is convinced he's going to drown on his back for some reason. Still, I'm impressed as heck. First they taught themselves to use the potty, then they taught themselves to swim. No complaints here!

How old were your kids when they learned to swim?

My Very Own Toothless

Ok, maybe not toothless but a tooth less for sure! 

First tooth gone!

Who told him that he could grow up??

Spring Baseball

So proud of my big boy! 3 game balls, season champs, and tournament runner ups! Not bad for his first season of (coach pitch) baseball! He had an absolute blast playing and being a part of his team. He will be seeing one of his coaches for private training this Summer and he is itching to get started already! I love that he has found a sport he loves so much. 

My Handsome Easter Boys

Big Boy Brag

Holy cow, its already March! When did that happen?? Of course with March weather, comes D's favorite pastime. Baseball! This year has been no exception. We started practice what feels like forever ago but the insane Georgia weather this year put off several weeks of it because of snow and ice and cold. 

He has spent, in true D style, a lot of time observing all of the other kids styles and field habits. He wants to know it all before he goes full out. Still, for his very first year of coach pitch, he is rocking it. He had his first game this past weekend and he hit his very first home run! I'm talking smacked the ball like a pro, took off, and didn't stop until he and all three kids in front of him on the bases had crossed home plate. 

The look of pride and joy on that little boy's face as he strutted back to the dug out was completely priceless. I went over to the fence at the dugout to get a kiss and he exclaimed "Did you see that??". 

I did baby. I did and it has made me smile for days. 

Unfortunately, they did end up losing the actual game 16-18. Only by two points though and my big boy scored 4 of those in one swing! Of course, that meant he got to come home with the most coveted of little boy trophy's, the very first game ball of the season. 

Oh, how I love this little man. 

No Days Like Snow Days!

This week, Atlanta got hit with a rarity. An early winter ice storm that completely shut down the city. I'm talking apocalyptic in a sad and truly Southern kind of way. People stuck in their cars for hours and hours, kids had to sleep at school because the buses couldn't navigate, we were stuck where we were for literally 4 days straight while the government struggled to figure out what went wrong and how to fix it. 

In the meantime though, my boys had a blast playing in the snow and staying home for an impromptu vacation! We played outside and drank hot cocoa to our hearts content. Then we napped and snuggled while watching endless rounds of Sheriff Callie (shoot me). 

Of course going back to school on Monday is going to be a struggle for all of us but it has been nice to have a break to just hang around for a bit and be silly. I have a feeling this is not the last we will see of Winter's nasty side this year. I just hope that Atlanta is better prepared for it next time!

A little bonus silliness from YouTube:

Six

My sweet baby D,

What a little man you have turned into! Recently you started Kindergarten and I'm not going to lie, it kind of broke your Mama's heart! Not that you aren't ready, I'm not ready! You stepped into the role of elementary school student like it was no big deal. A little shy but still the one that every one knows. Everyone talks about how sweet and cute you are. The most common comment is "those eyes!".

It doesnt surprise me though. You are a handsome little man. You are looking a little more like me lately too instead of a straight copy of your daddy. You are growing up.

Of course you have the most amazing personality to go along with the looks too. You are sweet. Genuinely sweet. You like for everyone to be happy and you will play with anyone.  You are kind hearted too. You giving and caring and just... sweet. I love that about you. Ive said it before but you are always so wise beyond your years.

Not to say you dont love to play. You love anything that is physical and involves lots of energy. I have you signed up to take hip hop dance classes and you want to be in the school musical that is coming up. I think keeping you busy keeps you sane. You love to be social and being active while being social is even better. Maybe we will try a sport again this spring.

You and your brother are the best of friends though. You two are trouble together but you are such amazing playmates. You are always sure to involve your little brother in whatever game you are playing,  even when he takes over and changes the rules so that he wins.

Tonight, when I told you it was bed time, you asked if I would tuck you in and sing you your song. I told you I would, just like every night, and you said "Even if I'm six?". D, I will sing to you, hold you in my arms, and love you through and through every night, every moment you'll let me, for your whole life. I love you so very much. The moments when you curl up in my lap, arms and legs overflowing, and snuggle into my chest is what keeps me going sometimes. You love big and you love your Mama most. I hope thats always the case because I know no matter what else life throws at us, that will never change.

I love you my big boy.

Love, Mama

Mini Gamers

Summer Lovin'

It has been an awesome summer. The boys and I have gotten some good sun, some amazing food, and even more fun. We have ouspent more time outside this summer than we have been able to in the past and we are all both enamored and exhausted.

There have been the countless days spent in the water. We go to the "beach" at the lake and have spent the day swimming and cooking out and just generally relaxing and bonding and having great fun as a family. The boys have really enjoyed playing in the water way more than the sand, which was not something I expected. I really thought that Littles at least would enjoy building and crashing sand castles but they would much rather be floating around in the water.



We also spent some time checking out the local water parks. The county we used to live in opened a new aquatics center this spring and we have enjoyed going and splashing around. We checked out several of the local YMCA's pools and such too. Some better than others but definitely none as much fun as White Water.

This year was the first year that the boys have been able to go to White Water and they have absolutely fallen in love. The first time we went it was just D, a close friend, and me. D had so much fun riding all the rides and it wasn't busy so we rode most of them at least twice, spending about 5 hours. The second time we went, we took K. I have to say the littles completely had us stunned. He rode everything he was tall enough for and wanted to ride the ones he wasn't. I thought he would hate it but he had more fun than D!


Speaking of general kid fun, the boys also got to ride their first go karts this summer and they are hooked. Here again though, it was K that seemed to be more enthused about getting to do it. Baby loves him some speed.

All in all, its been an amazing kind of Summer break. Soon, D heads to Kindergarten though and everything is going to be a whole lot different. I'm sad that our Summer is coming to a close but I am also ready to move on into birthday season and all the fun that Fall has to offer.

Bunk Beds!

Last week, the boys took a big step. Well, okay, a big step for me anyway. They upgraded to bunk beds! It was a half surprise from a loved one, half letting them pick out the bedding type of a deal. Needless to say, they are mad excited.

They have actually done a lot better about sleeping in them than I would ever thought they would. I figured that D especially would have a hard time adjusting because he usually does when anything changes. He has done great so far though. He is loving being the big boy and climbing up into bed where his brother can't reach him to pester him. K on the other had regularly falls asleep in the floor/ in the yard/ wherever he stops, so I knew he would be fine.  Of course, K has already gotten "stuck" up on the top bunk once already by climbing up there and being to chicken to climb back down. At least Captain Clumsy knows his limits? His brother has tried to help him figure out how to go up and down the ladder but its only half hearted at best because he really doesn't particularly want him up there. Which I can't blame him for. Everyone needs their own space. 

K picked Cars.

D picked Spiderman.

The best change so far? D is obsessed with keeping his bed made. Loving it!

Up next is a little paint and some decorations to match their choices of bedding. Luckily they are both pretty much the same color scheme. Here's to growing up!

Bigs Jumps Rope!

Not bad for a first timer, right??

Two T Ball Boys

Last fall, D started playing tball. He loved it. It was the thing he looked forward to every week and every weekend. He took his time as an "Athletic" very seriously and got the "most improved" and "best team player" award at the end of the season. So, of course, it was natural that he play again this spring. What I wasn't expecting was to sign K up too.

I had originally signed K up to play soccer instead because it just seemed to be more his thing. More fast paced, more running, more falling over. The thing is though, after I signed him up, I got an email that he was going to be the youngest in the league by almost a full year. Thats a lot of age difference
when you are 3 (and hopelessly clumsy).

So, I decided to change him to tball too. He was actually more excited about the idea than I thought he would be and D was not so surprisingly gracious about accepting his little brother into "his" game. They play one the same team and the two are always little partners in crime on the field.

Its been so much fun to watch them play together. D is definitely the more athletic of the two. My slugger. K mostly likes to run and play in the dirt but some day he is going to make an awesome baseman. Other kids bounce off that little boy like a brick wall. He's solid.

This fall though, D will play coach pitch, while K stays in tball another year. I am making the most of it and enjoying every game and practice until then. My little duo.

Pizza Night! #WW

Fun in the Sand #WW

The Perfect Insta-Weekend #WW

Nickname Theory

Nicknames were kind of  source of contention around my house when I was a kid. I always kind of felt like I got jipped in the nickname department. That probably had something to do with the fact that my most used nickname was rather less than flattering and by the time I knew what my own name was, it embarrassed the dickens out of me. Of course that meant it was used more often. In public. Loudly.

It didn't hurt that I stood before the entire congregation and announced it as my given name during children's church one Sunday. I have not yet, almost 30 years later, lived that down. Moral: never hand a three year old a microphone.

At any rate, when I came of childbearing age, many years before I bore a child (aka puberty), I made a pact with myself to not ever give my kids nicknames. I was going to give them a name and use only that name for their whole entire life so that they never had to endure the torment that I felt I had endured. No chances of public humiliation there.

Of course, as I got older and realized how unreasonable it was to think that I could own so much as a sweater without giving it a nickname, I relented and promised myself I would only give them "good" nicknames. The kind that would never embarrass them. You know, things like "sunshine" or "sweetheart". 

I actually held with that pretty well with D. When we found out I was pregnant with him, we called him "beegee" until we knew that he was a he and then we called him by his name or just "sweet baby D". After he was born, he acquired the names "love bug" and "lovie" because of his sweet temperament. As he got older he grew into "wild man" and eventually "bigs" and "biggie" when he became a big brother. K gave him his newest nickname "bruba", which stuck with all of us. All of which were tame and sweet. It matches his disposition in general. Ever the lover boy that one.

Then we had K. At first, he was simply "squeakers" because of the way he squeaked when he nursed or got excited or upset or... you get the idea. He was also "snuggle butt" which eventually became "snuggle pig" which digressed to just "pigs" as he has grown. There is even a "snuggle pig" song. As if snuggle pig wasn't bad enough, he has also acquired the name of "shorty short fatty cakes" ("fatty" for short) which is a tribute to his stature. Of course he is also ever my "hulk baby". Then there is "littles" and "monster". Any one of which you would think would hurt his little ego but it doesn't bother him and to be quite frank, they suit him. My crazy, off the wall kid gets the crazy nicknames.

Obviously things have gone swiftly down hill in the nickname department. Poor K is getting jipped just like I did. Maybe its a second child thing? Or maybe its because K and I share certain personality traits that make us susceptible to those kinds of injustice? 

Finding Fitness Motivation

I am, by default, a fairly lazy person. I get my stuff done but then I like to relax and just hang out with the boys. We watch movies or play in the yard or read books on the couch. Not that we are sedentary, just not as active as we probably could be. As active as I should be at the very least. All you have to do is look at my wedding photos to see that.

Of course I have my "reasons" for letting myself go over the years. There are the health problems, the pregnancies, and the stress over money, jobs, kids, etc. There have been instances in my marriage that cause my self esteem to plummet, the lack of support from those close, and being generally busy keeping up with the boys. All of those things can lead you to gain weight but a big part of it is just because I simply lacked motivation.

Motivation is a tricky one for me in the corny sense of the word. I roll my eyes at motivational quotes and posters ("Nothing will taste as good as being skinny will feel"? Screw that, pass the Ben & Jerry's.). I take compliments and turn them into something I need to change. Self doubt is a big theme around here.

Thing is, I don't want my boys to see that. I don't want them to see my lack of confidence or lack of motivation and think that is how life works. If nothing else, having to scratch and claw my way out of the gutter I was left in for 2012 has taught me that sometimes, the only motivation you need is in your heart. My heart wants me to succeed for their sake but also for my own.

So, I have been taking those snippets of time when I would normally sit around and check Facebook or just dazing out into space, and lacing up the new running shoes I got for Christmas. Or encouraging the boys to do push ups with me in the bedroom floor. Or turning on some loud dance music and having a crazy dance party with glow sticks. Going outside to play with the hula hoops Aunti got the boys for Christmas. Something to get us moving, which usually leads to some other kind of shenanigan.

So far: I've lost 3lbs in 2 weeks.

Bonus: The boys love it. They love acting crazy with Mama. K loves to dance and sing and play. The running and exercises not so much, but he does make for a great, giggly weight for some of mine. Nothing like a 40lb weight on your back during a brisk walk to burn those calories! D, on the other hand, loves doing push ups and crunches with Mama and let me tell you what, he can be as discerning a personal trainer as any I have ever seen. "Do more Mama! C'mon! Don't stop now!", all the while he is pounding them out like a miniature body builder. How can I stop with him cheering me on?

How's that  for motivation? How could I not let him encourage me. They don't even know the health aspect, they just thinks its another fun thing to do with Mama. Their favorite kind of thing even. Which means that they ask to do those things with circles back around to more motivation! Heres hoping we can keep it up. If we can encourage each other, we may just make it!

2013 List

Back story: Every year for the last 9 years, I have had a list of things to accomplish. For the last 3 I have blogged about them for you all to see, learn from, or hold against me (2010, 2011, 2012). Hopefully more the last two than the last. Still, the premise is simple: 12 things, 12 months, 12 posts.

Last year, I did not complete my list. It makes me really sad to admit that but I suppose you win some, you lose some. Last year was not what I had expected of it any way. In reality, there were only tow things that I missed though and that isn't too bad considering. I didn't get to have my dinner party and we didn't go on a family bike ride. Rules are rules though and since they didn't happen last year, they get tagged on to the 2013 list.

This year, though, I decided to make the focus of my yearly list a little different. I want to focus on more lifestyle things. Things that will better my boys and I in the long run versus smaller things that are fun to do in the moment. If that makes sense. You can see that I have a few things on this years list that will be harder on my heart, both mentally and physically, than I will ever admit but I know that they have to happen. Of course there are things that we will have considerable fun doing as well.

1. Get divorced. Officially. It breaks me to admit that where I was so desperately in love this time last year, I am simply prepared for the end of my marriage. To move on.

2. Get a working vehicle. The van that we bought when I wrecked my old van is in T's name and is not in safe, working order. He won't fix it and I won't fix someone elses car. Stalemate. The boys and I need transportation and soon.

3. Make more connections in the blogging world. Fact is: I love doing it and its something fulfilling that pays me back in its own off beat ways. I would love to attend a blogging conference or two. In fact, I may already have one on the line. Cheating? Maybe. And? Still exciting and still hasn't happened yet so it makes the list.

4. Get K involved in a sport or activity of some sort. My poor littles is so very clumsy but I really think he would just adore doing something outside the house. D had this spot on the 2012 List but this year it is K's turn. Of course I will continue to keep D in T-ball but soccer just wasn't his thing.

5. Get my life organized! I am in serious need of getting my life in order. We have moved so many times in the last 8 years that everything has been shuffled around in boxes and not looked at since. Its time to pull out those boxes and do some serious housekeeping. Everything from papers to decorations to toys needs to be sorted and put back in its proper place.

6. Get my sewing machine fixed. This is a big one for me. I have mentioned it before but I am a rather tall lady. Tall = no store bought clothing that doesn't cost an arm and a leg. I would love to be able to make myself some girly skirts and tops that would actually be long enough. Its a stupidly simple thing that would mean a lot to me at least.

7. Train for a marathon. Yes, me. The arthritic, helpless old lady. More and more I am reading and being told by doctors that taking back up my old habit of running might actually do some good on these old bones. Add in the bonus of having more energy and a clearer mind state and I can't resist. As far as actually running a marathon, I would love to but I can't exactly financially commit to something that I might not be able to complete. Who knows though, maybe it will happen!

8. Take my boys on a trip by myself. It be Chattanooga or Black Rock we need an adventure to help center us back on each other. Without distractions or interference.

9. Take a class to better myself. Self defense seems like a logical choice but I would also love to renew my CPR/ First Aid certification or take a photography class of some sort. Who knows what it will end up being but I want it to definitely be something that will have impact.

10. Cut out caffeine. For about 10 years when I was in high school and beyond, I had cut out caffeine completely. It literally wasn't until D was born that I started drinking it again and it has slowly taken over again. I know its bad for me and I know its going to be so hard to cut out but I really think it will make me feel better to just cut it out.

11. Go on a family bike ride. Of course, everyone but me has a bike though so this is kind of a two part type deal. First: Buy me a bike. Second: Family bike ride. Bonus: Take a picnic. (2012 leftover)

12. Host a dinner party. I don't care if its just a few people or a hundred. The last gathering we had at our house was after a funeral and its time to correct that juju. Plus, its time to put some of those Pinterest ideas to work! (2012 leftover)

So what do you think? Think we will be able to get it all done? Say no so its more of a challenge. Heh. Here we go ladies and gents, lets render this mama to the moon!