Beginnings

This weekend marks a big milestone for both of my babies. It will be the beginning of D's last month as a two year old and the beginning for K's last month as an infant. See, their birthday's are the 14th (K) and the 15th (D) of next month. My toddler is all grown up and my baby will be a toddler in a months time. I have really been struggling with it this week for some reason. I am not ready to have two big boys. Even though the transition has already begun.


I was talking to D last night about some of his toys when it hit me that we were having an actual conversation. No more babble, no more short sentences or pointing and grunting. He is a little chatter box and isn't afraid to try big words. Then there is the tricycle and the start of "school". He is getting pretty deft at playing games on the computer and is learning new things all the time. He is no longer the baby that I used to rock for hours on end just snuggling close and smelling his smell. The snuggles are still pretty awesome but they are less and less as he grows and gains independence.

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Then there is little Mr. K, who is looking more and more grown up all the time. His proportions are less and less baby like. His body is getting ready to take off running. He stands at the coffee table that just months ago, was where he liked to nap on top of. He has his favorite toys and foods and people. His big brother is his idol. His temperament, even in the last month, has evened out and even though he still has his Hulk- baby moments, they are growing less as he is growing more. He is more social all the time too. Less and less all about his Mama, which of course slightly breaks my heart, but its good to see his relationship develop with others too. He is no longer the tiny little monkey that laid on my chest for so many hours in the hospital sleeping and nursing and sleeping and nursing. Now when he nurses, he is ready to go. Off on another baby adventure.

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I guess its just a crazy transition to do both at once. Not that I can really help that. Maybe its the fact that we may not have any more kids thats getting me. Maybe thats what makes it so hard for them to grow up. Or maybe its just that they are my little babies and maybe I will never see them as anything else. I am so proud of my little boys though. They are both such awesome little people already and I am loving seeing them transform into even better "bigger" people. This weekend is just the beginning of the adjustment. Its only going to get better from here.