Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Here I sit.

I have a million things I should be doing. Am I doing them? Well, obviously not silly. Look back at the title of this post. I even posted yesterday about all the things I should be doing and I am not so proud to admit that I have yet to do a single thing that I mentioned in that post. Yep, thats me. Captain responsibility.

Thing is though, I get so tired of being the "responsible one". The "mommy". Now, don't get me wrong. I love my kids, I love my husband, I love my family. In fact I spend most of my time playing with and snuggling them which is probably why I get nothing done. I just get tired of doing things sometimes. You know, the laundry, the cleaning, the cooking. Blah, blah, blah. Not even just the physical stuff either though. The general hand holding gets me too. Reminding T eight million times to do the simplest thing or listening to my mother go on and on about some inane trouble again. Being the only one that ever knows where anything is in the entire house. I can't even tell you how many times T asks me where something is a day. Usually something that he was in charge of to begin with and usually before he even really looks for it. Am I the only woman that is supposed to have a radar that can pinpoint anything and every thing that someone is looking for?

So, sometimes I just need a break. A break from reality. A break from responsibilities and thought process. Usually I get that time while T bathes the boys and puts them to bed but somedays that hour just isn't enough. Days like today. Where I just kind of shut down. I take care of the boys but thats really pretty much it for the day. I know, I know. I am so lucky to get to stay at home with my babies and I should cherish every second of playing housewife and all that. I do cherish every second I spend with my boys people. Its everything else that gets tedious. I have never been particularly domestic. I keep thinking that one day it will catch me in a dark alley, kick my ass and I will learn my lesson but so far I have evaded the domestication process.

Anyway, someone tell me I am not the only one who ever feels this way... Right??

5 comments:

  1. Girl. That whole second paragraph could have been written by me... I am sick of telling Stephen where things are, and asking him a billion times to do one task... i let his laundry sit (the clean basket) in our room for over a week thinking he would see it, and put it away... nope. I had to ask many times before he did it. Hang in there mama! I think sometimes out men think we are their moms too. ((HUGS))

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  2. no, you aren't alone. i don't even stay home and i feel this way. it's so tiring sometimes to be the one responsible for everybody. you take care of everyone around you and sometimes, just sometimes, i wish someone would take care of *me*. but, we are the mamas, and that is our job for better or for worse.

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  3. I feel that way and my baby isn't even born yet. I'm definitely the "grownup" in my marriage and in my social circle... it becomes very draining.

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  4. As much as I am sorry you ladies feel this way too, I am actually kind of glad I'm not alone!

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  5. Oh. My. Gosh. LOVE this blog! (And I've only read 2 posts so far!) Talk about real...you are IT. I SO know how you feel. I feel that way too. I think it's funny that as moms (especially stay-at-home moms) we feel like we have to apologize for having a bad day or just wanting to worry about ourselves and ourselves only for a while. It simply is not healthy to never have alone time (in my esteemed opinion, but who am I really?) I do the same thing. I say "I love my kids, I love my husband..." because I don't want anyone to think I'm ungrateful. Let's make a deal...you are free to be real with me on my blog and I will do the same with you, ok? No apologies necessary! Can't wait to read more!

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