Wait, what happened??

When did I grow up? I was sitting in my van at Target last night, thinking about dinners for the week and this and that when I heard a bunch of girls laughing and talking loudly getting into the car parked directly in front of me. The oldest was maybe 18. They were laughing and cutting up, smoking and popping their gum while they did. It struck me that their outfits fit them and looked well put together. Their hair was freshly washed.

I sat there in my van watching as they all piled into a tiny little Honda and took off. For a minute I thought about when my life used to be that easy. So carefree and simple. When all I had to look out for was myself. I was never one of the "popular" girls. Never cared that much about makeup or hairstyles, but I never really had to worry about money or kids or dinner. I came and went as I pleased. I hung out with my girlfriend till 3 or 4am at Walmart sometimes just because we could. I wondered when I went and got all grown up. I didn't know anything was missing so there was no reason to think about it back then.

Then somehow, my focus shifted to my kids. Am I missing anything? Or have I just transformed. My jealousy immediately melted away in thoughts of the way their little faces light up when they see me. The funny way that K yells "Hiiiiiiiiii" when you walk into a room, even if you have only been gone for a few minutes. The way he laughs when you tickle him under his chin. The way he snuggles in close and crosses his little feet when its time to nurse. Then there is D, my little man. He is so full of life its contagious. He loves to run and jump and wrestle and play but sometimes, he likes to just lay on Mama's chest and snuggle like there is nothing better. The way he comes up, strokes my cheek and says "I sorry mama, I lub you" when he knows I'm frustrated or sad and then pulls me away to play cars with him in the floor. The days the three of us spend just lazing around the house playing with toys or the crazy, hectic days we spend running errands, either way we have a blast.

I thought I had it all then but look what I have now. My life with these boys (all three of them) it so infinitely more happy and fulfilling. I realized the things that would have once been so desperately important to me seem silly and childish now. I guess priorities change. They warp and melt into something entirely different. Maybe even more than a few times in life I guess. In this case it was a slow change of sorts. The pregnancies and births of my babies changed my entire outlook on life, so why wouldn't they change my priorities. Somehow, a perfect outfit and fabulous hair doesn't seem as important as happy, clean kids. I guess I realized as I sat there, long after those girls drove off, just how much has changed in the last ten years. I went from a carefree, wild teenager with no responsibilities, to a full time mommy of two with all of the responsibility. Would I trade a single second of it? Nope. That is whats great about growing up.

Update on us!

So, in case you haven't figured it out, we are still internet-less. I do most everything on my phone but for some reason I can't find the time to blog lately. Shame on me, I know. Our summer has been lots of fun so far though. We have spent most of our time hanging around the house or at the pool or hanging out with friends. My bestie had a birthday cookout for me a few weeks ago and it was so awesome to just hang out with friends and drink and talk. The kids had a blast and I think the husbands even had a good time, which is fairly rare. We also got to go see the Phantom of the Opera at the Fox theater in the ATL (Thanks, Tommy!). It was so nice to get out in the day time, have a good (uninterrupted) lunch and see a great show. Otherwise we have spent our time just chilling at home, occasionally wandering out front to the playground or trying to make the most of the days T is off from work.

D is a little swimmy fish. He loves going to the pool and has really taken off in the swimming department. He still wears arm floaties but I think by the end of summer he won't need them anymore. He jumps in and goes under water without a worry and has been doing awesome at holding his breath underwater. He spends most of his time doing that or swimming around talking to the random neighbors in the pool. If it was up to him, we would spend all day, every day poolside. We haven't been since he hurt his arm though and I think he is suffering withdraws. He has been carrying his pool noodle around the house for the last two days. Fine, until he starts whacking his mother on the head with it. Then it goes to time out. He is so freaking smart sometimes though it freaks me out. Kid has a mind like a steel trap and remembers the tiniest little details about the most random stuff. Like the names of more dinosaurs than I do. Pretty funny how that is what he has latched onto. Knows all his letters and numbers to 15 by sight too but he really wants to know more about dinosaurs and less about useful stuff. Trains are also a big hit but I thing he figures he knows all he needs to about them because he doesn't ask many questions. Potty training is so two months ago and he doesn't even want our help anymore. Makes me a little sad but I can't tell you how nice it is to not have to change his nasty diapers anymore. I'm still amazed at how stupidly easy he was to potty train, even though he has always been easy about stuff like that.

K is getting big fast here recently it seems. He has been crawling backwards for awhile now, looking back over his shoulders as he goes. It pretty hilarious to watch but he is surprisingly agile that way. He has also become a master at pulling himself up onto anything and everything in the last few months. Which is fine, until he tries to pull up on one of the rocking chairs in the living room and it knocks him backwards onto his butt. He also feels the need to scream like a maniac when he gets up or down. Not sure what thats about. Well, other than the fact its a running joke in the house that he is going go green, rip out of his clothing and turn into the Incredible Hulk one of these days because of his temper. He shakes his tiny fists of fury at us when he thinks he isn't getting something he wants. Which rarely last for more than a couple of seconds and he is back to happy monster. Anyway, in the last week he has figured out the crawling forward thing and he gets extremely excited that he can actually see where he is going. Sometimes so excited that he gets going too fast, flops down on his face and skids across the carpet for a full foot, which usually is followed by a Hulk episode. He is a little chatterbox too, at least compared to how his brother was. He says Mama, Dada, Nana, No, Bruba (brother), Hi, buh-bye and sings Lalalalalalala to music. The rest of the time its pretty much constant babble. He has become our soundtrack to everyday life. Its bad to say, but I am kind of glad he isn't as physical as D was at this age. D did everything early. Made it seem like he grew up SO fast. K has done things early too but not as early as D did. Somehow, it seems like K has been a baby- baby for longer, which is great because he may very well be our last.

Its been fun to watch him and D's relationship continue to blossom this summer too. D gets so excited when he hears K wake up in the morning and goes running into his room where he is met by an enthusiastic squeal from his little brother when he gets there. K has a special squeal just for his brother and it absolutely melts my heart. Add in the random hugs and kisses they give each other and it makes for a very happy mama. No worries about D being jealous of his little brother when he adores him so much. I guess it shouldn't really surprise me. D has always been a very gentle and loving soul. Even though he is so active and physical, he has always been gentle with kids smaller than him. If he does get too rough, its always a miscalculation. The same thing times ten applies with K. He is gentle and sweet and is really good at playing games with him. Of course the same isn't always true with K. He wants to wrestle with his brother like he sees him do with Daddy. Sometimes he just crawls over and tackles D or pulls his hair or kiss attacks him. Even then, D is always very gentle and either hugs him to the ground or walks away. Makes Mama so proud.

So thats us in a nutshell right now. Just hanging around, living. Trying to stay cool in the hot southern weather. We are weighing our options right now as to what we are going to do this fall. Moving or staying, which direction to go with homeschool, what to do for their birthdays, etcetera, etcetera, etcetera. Stay tuned.

Our July 4th weekend

Not exactly the fun filled, pool playing weekend we had planned for I suppose but at least we got to spend a lot of time together. I woke up Friday morning in a funk. I had a migraine, was achy all over and just generally blah. I called T and bitched and moaned for half an hour about how I felt like crap. He eventually got the hint and came home to watch the boys so that I could rest. I ended up deciding to take a hot bath so I could try to relax .

About the time I got the tub filled up, got just the right amount of my yummy lavender bath salts in, and got in to soak, T came in with a crying D on his arm. He proceeded to tell me that he has been crying for about twenty minutes and he can't get him to stop. If you know D, thats not normal. He is a tough little guy who almost never actually sheds tears. This time though, he had huge crocodile tears streaming down his face and he immediately shimmied down his daddy and came over to the edge of the tub reaching for me. I noticed immediately that his left arm was hanging limp at his side. Oh, shit. I asked T what had happened and he told me that he had been playing with K in the floor and D was playing behind him and he had just started crying. He had no idea what happened. When I pointed out his arm, T said “Yeah, I noticed. Do you think he hurt it?”. Um, yeah.

(Ok, heres a little backstory. Last summer, when I was about 8 months pregnant with K, I was at a store with D and when we went to leave, he had a typical toddler fit and tried to throw himself down to the ground. Thing was, we were on the concrete sidewalk, so I tightened my grip on his hand to keep him from hitting his head. Bad idea. As soon and he stood up, I knew his elbow was hurt. He started crying and cradling it with his other hand. After a few minutes, he stopped crying but he just wasn't right. I had some experience with nursemaid's elbow and just knew that was it. A couple of ER trips and a few x-rays later, I was right, his elbow was back in place and all was well. Mental note: If your heavy for his age toddler tries to throw himself at the sidewalk, let him.

So, I stripped D naked and pulled him into the tub with me and he melted into my chest and just layed there for a few minutes until he collected himself and stopped crying. I tried for a few minutes to get him to use that arm and he refused. Plus, every time I bent his arm he screamed again. T and I made eye contact and the only thing I said was “Here we go again”. So, T went to work getting the diaper bag ready, I called my mother to come watch K and got me and D dressed. About an hour later, we made it to the ER. Again, a couple of x-rays but this time the doctor said it must have popped back into place before we got there because it all looked normal. No dislocations, no fractures, no nothing. She said it would be sore for a day or so but then he should be back to normal. We headed home relieved but I still thought it seemed strange that he wasn't using it at all still. Last time he started using it within a few minutes of it being popped back in but she was so sure.

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We got home and just lazed around the house for the evening. That night after the boys ate dinner we all snuggled up in our bed. Tommy and I just chilling and talking, D was curled up against my chest with his head on my arm like a little baby and K was rolling and flailing wildly like he does. Eventually T and K wandered off and D fell asleep on my arm. I didn't have the heart to wake wake him but I had not had dinner yet, so I wiggled out and let him sleep. I got K all snuggled up in bed and then went back to bed with D. Tommy volunteered to sleep on the couch so we wouldn't have to wake D.

Saturday we woke up, went grocery shopping for our cookout and just generally futzed around town until nap time, after which we had our cookout and got ready to go watch the fireworks. The whole time, D protected his arm like crazy. He refused to use it for anything and just let it hang at his side. Even while running around with his little friends, waiting for the fireworks to start, he still protected that arm.

Sunday morning he woke up still not using it so back to the ER we went, this time the
whole family in tow. We got seen quickly again and there was a different doctor on duty. He examined D's elbow and said it felt a little swollen still. He ran some blood work to make sure it wasn't getting infected and sent us home with a diagnosis of a bruise in the joint and a referral to see a pediatric orthopedist. As if that wasn't fun enough, they wrapped his arm up in a hard splint and put it in a sling to help stabilize it so it would heal. D was so excited that the sling had dinosaurs on it that he didn't mind the cast at all. The bad thing is though, it means no swimming, no climbing, no rough play, etc. All of which are D's favoritest games. We did,
however, still go to the independence day party we had planned on going to. He ended up having a blast even with one arm three times its size and immobilized.

He has been really good about it considering. He just drags his arm around with him and uses it as a pillow when he is playing in the floor. We have had a little bit of a time keeping him somewhat subdued but I am really not too worried about it. We took the splint off last night after his bath just to check up on it and he seemed to be using his arm a lot more. Still a little stiff but still much better. We put it back on so he wouldn't twist it during his sleep and I took it back off this morning to let him stretch it out some. Hopefully we will get an appointment with the orthopedics doctor today or tomorrow. We are still waiting to hear back.

Fun holiday weekend right?? Or not. Like I said though, at least we got to spend it together of sorts. We still got to do our cookout and hang out with our friends. So I guess, all in all, it was still a hit. Now we just have to get the one armed wonder back to normal so we can hit the pool. I never did get my hot bath.